Privacy , privacy . Have i got any? noooooooooooo!
its essential to my living . i yearn for it an the span of time between here and there .
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What the devil was i thinking?..i cant sew!
im thinking maybe i should have gotten
the hello kitty sewing machine.
i might just, have a chance at operating it!
...sewing is very frustrating ,is it worth it? i need to know.
i have no outlet no space. my aniexty has reached a new high .
i cant even just leave the hose to get away .
my mother zones out on computer games an monoploy on the tv.
all you hear is silents an small game noises,it depresses the hell out of
me. and i feel like giving p i tryed to help her ,and i needed her help .i needed help ypu know.
she just drones out in a chair all day to a mindless game i get sick inside.
it just gets worse an worse some days she doesnt even bother to put on pants shell wait till the last minute till my dad comes home to even resemble the living.
im remeber this as a child how fucking depressed it made me inside, how the days felt so draged out an long with her. i feel it all comeing back nad with my anixety an no where to go i feel so hopeless .
its all coming back an i know im stuck around this .the high ridden stress aniexty my father brings home and a depressed life draining expressions of a mother. no wonder i ran like hell .
the fact that no one acknowleges its heavy preasents or that any of this exsist .leaves u a lil more dead each day. i dont know if i can make it in this enviroment i dont no if i have the will or energy to fight it .